Fear of Abandonment

Though my father and mother forsake me, the Lord will receive me. Psalm 27: 10

Dylan is a pretty strong, young man.  He is solid as a rock.  I tell you, the weight lifting equipment he made me "invest" in is paying off.  But, inside that tough façade, he is mush. We tease him because he's afraid of tiny bugs...I mean, who isn't, right? But one thing that is no joke with my son is this one thing he is terrified of: abandonment. There is a deep-seated, primal dread in his psyche of being rejected...forsaken.  Though this angst works mostly at the subconscious level and he doesn't quite understand it...he feels it.  And it rattles him every time it surfaces. It is this feeling what makes him specially sensitive to stories of neglect.  So, when he came home after spending time at a Christian concert-camping adventure, he related to me some of the accounts he heard from the morning talks he attended and from some other more personal sources.  He was really taken by the horrific tales he heard and I could see the fear emerging.  At the end of his narrations, he said:  "but you love me, right?"

In my deeply rooted inadequacy as a mother, I rely on the Holy Spirit to guide me in this rockiest of paths, the path of parenthood...and He blessed me by moving me to do what my son needed at that moment of extreme vulnerability: give him a big hug and quietly reassure him that of course I love him. 

My love for my son goes beyond what I can express and demonstrate to him.  But it doesn't matter as long as he remembers that there is a greater love...a love we don't deserve, but that is given nonetheless

But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us. Romans 5: 8

A love that remains even when everyone else has left us...forsaken us...a love that endures even when we are not worthy ... because, like Paul says in Romans 8: 35-39...

Can anything ever separate us from Christ’s love? Does it mean he no longer loves us if we have trouble or calamity, or are persecuted, or hungry, or destitute, or in danger, or threatened with death? (As the Scriptures say, “For your sake we are killed every day; we are being slaughtered like sheep.” No, despite all these things, overwhelming victory is ours through Christ, who loved us.

And I am convinced that nothing can ever separate us from God’s love. Neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither our fears for today nor our worries about tomorrow—not even the powers of hell can separate us from God’s love. No power in the sky above or in the earth below—indeed, nothing in all creation will ever be able to separate us from the love of God that is revealed in Christ Jesus our Lord.

Dylan kept telling me all about his experiences at the concert/camping trip he'd just returned from...as I listened, I kept thinking how much I love this kid and how grateful I am God decided to lend him to me for these years...I am so not worthy of such a gift...but that is the mystery of God's love, that even when we are so insignificant that even our own fathers and mothers might forsaken us...the Lord receives us...

Thank you, Lord Jesus for never abandoning us and for having such profound love for us that we don't have to fear because nothing could ever separate us from You.  In Your Precious Name.  Amen!