Thank You for My Anxiety

Sweaty palms...increased heart rate...cold feet...shakiness...an overall sense of fear overcoming my mind, soul and body...

I walk down the hallways at work.  I take brisk walks around my neighborhood when it's sunny outside (which is not often enough by any stretch of the imagination).  I watch movies.  I panic-pray...

Sigh...

Panicky prayers race through my mind like watching a Nascar event: speedingly going around in circles and getting nowhere.

Finally, the Lord, in His immense patience and immeasurable love sends me a hint in the form of a devotional reading:  "In your hour of trouble, find the courage to thank Me."

This is the message that finally sinks into my messy heart, and I obey:  "Thank You, Lord, for my moments of anxiety for they allow me to get closer to You.  They point to my constant need for Your presence.  They remind me how desperate I am to feel Your hand in mine.

I know anxiety is a condition that can become debilitating and paralyzing.  I know medication is often the answer.  I have considered it myself, but I have not taken the step yet.  I also know that Jesus said:

"I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world." John 16: 33

Therefore, I believe, that since Jesus is in me and He is victorious, I am a victor by default!  I believe that the momentary problems of this world, are for a purpose and that they point to an eternity of rest under the shadow of the Almighty!

I also know that another thing that Jesus said was: 

Peace I leave with you; My peace I give to you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled; do not be afraid. John 14: 27

And I hang onto these words as a liferaft that will keep me afloat in the storm.  

As my heart pace relaxes and the temperature of my feet return to normal...I begin to breathe again.  I know my anxiety is not going to just disappear as if by magic.  But I know that His mercies are new every morning, and this morning I choose to believe Him and His Word, and I thank Him for allowing circumstances in my life that move me closer to Him!

Amen!