Following

Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me

All the days of my life;

And I will dwell[a] in the house of the Lord

Forever. Psalm 23: 6

I think I will separate verse 6 into two. Today, I will look at part A: “Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life…”

This first half of the verse makes me feel secured.

You know, it just occurred to me that I’ve been sharing my thoughts on this blog for a while now…I wasn’t sure when I started, so I scrolled down and saw that I actually began in 2011. That is 6 years for those of us who don’t do math. In my universe, six years is quite a long time.

But, that’s not what I’m thinking about today. The word that made me ponder on my blogging activity was “follow.”

Those in social media recognize that word. The word usually evokes feelings that could be considered as opposing concepts: a curse and/or a blessing. I remember earlier in my “career” as a Christian blogger desiring a big “following.” I craved to see more and more and more little pictures on the little corner that shows who follows my musings. I incessantly checked my posts’ statistics to see if people where actually reading my writings. I linked to several “blog parties.” I actually had like a sort of calendar, where I would link to different “blog parties” every day. I read every article on how to increase readership. In summary, I spent a decent amount of time trying to put my word out there to get the coveted followers.

After a few years of doing this, I realized that not only had I not increased my following, but it had actually decreased. There were less and less little pictures on my followers’ corner. This fact made me realize that I had probably just wasted my time. The only way I’d ever be “viral” would be if I got the flu. So, I stopped trying and I went back to the true purpose of my blog: to have a conversation with the Lord…a moment with Him…just the two of us…about something pressing in my mind and heart. And if others happen to stop by, and be blessed by it, well, Praised Be the Lord who inspired the whole thing!

Writing helps me think. It helps me concentrate. It helps me go deep. It helps me meditate on God’s truth. I’m not craving followers anymore. I’m craving the presence of my Heavenly Father. I’m not seeking a spike on my stats. I am trusting that by growing closer to Him who sustains me, surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life…

Anointed

You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies;

You anoint my head with oil;

My cup runs over. Psalm 23: 5

This verse usually makes me feel confused. I have to re-read it a few times until… I can finally start to marvel on what it says.

I can’t really separate the three lines of the verse. I have to read them together in order to grasp its meaning. Otherwise I would be like, “what?” “Why would I want anyone to put me at a table in front of my enemies…really!?” And, by the way, where did the Good Shepherd go? Is this the Good Shepperd setting the table…a table I don’t want to be at?

Sigh… Like I said…I’m so confused!

I feel as if there is a different imagery going on in here. Somehow, the Shepherd is now clearly The Lord. No metaphor here. God is revealed in the figure of the Shepherd. He is the One who prepares that table in the presence of my enemies. I know…I don’t want to be there. I’m uncomfortable. I’m nervous. I’m afraid. Imagine if I’m still the sheep…well…sheep usually don’t seat at the table…they end up on the table, if you know what I mean? But He has prepared that table. Therefore, it must be good. Although the enemies don’t just disappear, He is with us as we face them.

Not only is He there at the table with us as we sit in the presence of our enemies, but He anoints our head with oil. I mean, really?

This is another cultural practice that I don’t know anything about. All I know about pouring oil in my head is that it will make my hair shiny…and greasy…which might be a good thing so it is not so frizzy.

But anyway, I checked in my Jon Courson’s commentary and it refers us back to the Shepherd. It says that a Shepherd would pour oil on a sheep’s head for 2 reasons:

1. To keep the ticks and bugs out of the ears and eyes of the sheep.

2. To deflect the blows of bigger sheep when they butt heads.

Hmmmm…

I also read somewhere else (https://www.gotquestions.org/anointed.html) that in Bible times, people were anointed with oil to signify God’s blessing or calling. (Exodus 29:7; Exodus 40:9; 2 Kings 9:6; Ecclesiastes 9:8; James 5:14). A person was anointed for a special purpose—to be a king, to be a prophet, to be a builder, etc.

In the New Testament we see another meaning for the word anointed: "chosen one." The Bible says that Jesus Christ was anointed by God with the Holy Spirit to spread the Good News and free those who have been held captive by sin (Luke 4:18-19; Acts 10:38). After Christ left the earth, He gave us the gift of the Holy Spirit (John 14:16). Now all Christians are anointed, chosen for a specific purpose in furthering God's Kingdom (1 John 2:20). "Now He who establishes us with you in Christ and has anointed us is God, who also has sealed us and given us the Spirit in our hearts as a guarantee" (2 Corinthians 1:21-22).

Well…the bottom line is that to be anointed by God Himself is a mighty amazing thing. This is God sending as clear a signal as possible to the enemy sitting in front of us that we are not be messed with. This is God saying we belong to Him. We are set apart. We are of great value, and that whoever bugs us will have to answer directly to Him.

And finally, not only does God plant the equivalent of a big, bright neon sign on our heads that says “step off,” but He fills our cup beyond the brim until it overflows. Wow!

Picture God filling up your cup.

How do we begin to wrap our brains around that image?

The God of the Universe…serving us…serving me…the lowliest of His creatures.

Unfathomable!

I went from feeling confused to feeling overwhelmed with awe.

Praised be the Good Shepherd. Praised be His Holy Name!

The Scary Valley

Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death,

I will fear no evil;

For You are with me;

Your rod and Your staff, they comfort me. New King James - Psalm 23: 4

It has taken me way too long to get back to my look at Psalm 23rd in which I’m pondering how the verses in this treasured piece of Scripture make me feel. I am thinking, besides the fact that I have been insanely busy the last couple of weeks, that probably the main reason for the delay has been that this particular verse makes me feel…uneasy…

I have always loved this verse. I have found comfort in it in times of trouble. It has helped me regained confidence while in shaky grounds. It has brought stability when life has seemed up-side-down. But it also has made me feel worried while cruising.

One thing is to read this verse when I’m in the middle of that darkest of valleys; another one is to read it when life is all bright and sunny.

While in the pit, this assurance of the presence of God brings peace. While in the green pastures, reading about the valley of the shadow of death, truly, gives me the creeps.

I’m just being honest here. I know this is probably not your average meditation…but feelings and emotions are very personal…and this is what is inside my heart. I don’t want to think about the valleys when I’m up high, enjoying the view from the mountain-top. I don’t want to remember darkness when I am in the light. I don’t want to be reminded of the fact that there will be yet, another valley waiting for me at some point…while I am being refreshed near the still waters.

I am so selfish and so in-love with this world that I just want to make the superficial happiness of the material, last me every day of my stay on this Earth. This verse, however, brings me back to a place where the reality of suffering is made evident. Walking through the valley of the shadow of death is not something that happens only to “other” people. It happens to me too. And, though I may forget while on the mountain top…valleys of shadows of death are all too real.

Nobody likes walking through them. But some go through these valleys more graciously than others…I am not one of those gracious valley-walkers. Therefore, anything that reminds me of the fact that shadows are part of our wandering in this world makes me uneasy.

What to do?

I just have to finish reading the verse and BELIEVE IT! I have to believe He is Trustworthy! I have to believe that His promises are true and claim them! I have to claim His promise for my own life: He is with me in the valley of the shadow of death…He protects me. He takes care of me. He comforts me with His power and above all, with His presence. I know it in my mind. I just have to believe it in my heart and trust Him so I can take Him at His Word. That is the only way that the valley won’t seem so terrifying to me. That is the only way I won’t become queasy when reading this verse. That is the only way I will fear no evil as I continue my walk with The Lord.

Divine Navigation

He guides me along the right paths

for his name’s sake.

For a person who is always lost, the second part of verse 3 of Psalm 23 represents great hope.

Before I ever got a smart phone…which was way later than most people…my GPS used to be my husband Dan. Before I left for a place I was not familiar with, Dan would sit down with me, map in hand or in front of the computer screen and walk me through the route to wherever I was going. He would explain what I could expect, and give me landmarks so I would know if I was going the right way or if I had made a mistake. Often, I would have to call Dan from the road because something went wrong and he would guide me through every stop and turn until I found my way.

I don’t think I have ever thanked Dan for the years of long-distance-navigation-assistance he gave me. Thank you, Dan! I could have not gotten there without you.

I’m telling you. That’s why I don’t clean the house…if I did, how would I find my way without the breadcrumbs?

It is the same in life. I make a million decisions in one hour. But I spend months second-guessing myself. Did I choose the right meal for dinner tonight? Did I buy the right detergent? Should I have bought that laminating machine I saw at Aldi’s? Should I have said no to Dylan when he first asked me to watch that Michael Jackson video he is so obsessed with now? Should I had not pushed to move? Should I had pushed to go back?

Sigh…

I never know if I am going on the right direction. I get distracted by the lights on the road. The incoming traffic blinds me and I get disoriented.

It is a relief to remember that He, the Architect, Designer, Master Builder and Conductor of this thing I call my life is my Navigator, the most perfect one, who will never get me lost, even when I don’t know where I am. And why does He care? He cares because it is for His Name’s Sake. It is for His glory that I get where I need to go.

My Lord and My Shepherd, allow me to trust You enough to follow Your direction so I don’t have to feel lost ever again. Like the sheep follow the Good Shepherd because they know him and know he would take them to the good pastures, let me follow You, Lord…wherever you may lead me.

I am Restored

He makes me to lie down in green pastures;

He leads me beside the still waters.

He restores my soul;

How do I feel when I read these verses above? Mmmmm… I feel…restored, indeed!

I don’t know anything about being a sheep, but when I read this I just want to be one. I want to be that little sheep that gets to lie down in a field as green as emeralds, and that runs as far as my little sheep eyes can see. And when I’m thirsty, I want to be led by the water…preferably still, so I don’t have to be afraid or nervous with it being rough or rushing too hard.

But, as I read the first part of verse 2 again, I’m wondering...why does it say: “He makes me lie down…” Why does He have to “make me”? I mean, really?

This kind of makes me think of my sons, especially my older one, Grant. That kid does not like to lie down. He has never been one for sleeping much. When he was a little boy I had to “make him lie down” otherwise, he would have never taken a nap or slept at all. Later, he informed me that the reason was that he didn’t want to miss anything…man! Who cares? I wish I could take a nap. I wish…wait a minute…what am I saying?

Am I saying that I don’t voluntarily lie down either? What’s this: “I wish someone would make me take a nap”? Am I that restless that I need to be made to lie down?

The answer is a resounding YES!

People at work always make fun of me because I don’t stop. At home, everyone gets tired just to see me enter the house because they know peace has ended. They actually love it when I take a nap because they can finally chill. I am always on the run. I am always rushing. I’m exhausted.

Yes, I need to be made to lie down in the comfort of the Lord’s green pastures that He has reserved for me. And, since He knows I love me a beautiful water-front, He has placed the picture-perfect still waters right upon my view.

I can see it in my mind as I close my eyes…

My soul is restored!

I Shall not Want

"I am the good shepherd. The good shepherd lays down his life for the sheep.” John 10: 11

I’ve been thinking about Jesus as the Good Shepherd a lot lately…not necessarily by choice, but because everywhere, at church, on the radio, in my devotions, the theme keeps popping up. Today, I did make the choice, though, to meditate on it for a bit.

The question that came to my mind was: what does the idea of Jesus as the Good Shepherd make me think about? How does that image make me feel?

Well…as I begin to think about it to answer these questions, I decide it would be better if I take a look at one of my favorite psalms… the ultimate shepherd’s guide, Psalm 23:

The Lord is my shepherd;

I shall not want.

He makes me to lie down in green pastures;

He leads me beside the still waters.

He restores my soul;

He leads me in the paths of righteousness

For His name’s sake.

Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death,

I will fear no evil;

For You are with me;

Your rod and Your staff, they comfort me.

You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies;

You anoint my head with oil;

My cup runs over.

Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me

All the days of my life;

And I will dwell[a] in the house of the Lord

Forever.

I know, King James version, right? Well, it just doesn’t have the same feeling if I don’t use the King James…and since we are talking about how it makes me feel…well…there…

OK…yes, there are really good, insightful, amazingly thought-provoking and marvelously written volumes on Psalm 23rd…why add to the collection when it is nearing perfection? Well, I guess, I’d like to do my own personal meditations this time.

Therefore, I will go through this beloved Psalm one chunk at a time. Beginning, well, at the beginning:

The Lord is my Shepherd;

I shall not want.

I LOVE this verse. I never truly got it until I read Phillip Keller’s A Shepherd Looks at Psalm 23rd, my personal favorite when it comes to studies on this Psalm. I do recommend it! Anyway, before I read Keller’s book I was like, “I shall not want my Lord as my Shepherd? What?” Then, I finally realized it meant that since the Lord is my Shepherd, I will not be in want for anything because He supplies all of my needs. WOW…insert head explosion here!

Yep, no worries. As the sheep, I should have no worries about anything, because I have a Shepherd who is Good and who takes care of me. Then, how come I still worry?

Well, perhaps, it might have something to do with the fact that I don’t know my Shepherd enough to trust Him with my everything…

I think, yes.

Remember what Jesus tells us in John 10?

My sheep listen to my voice; I know them, and they follow me. John 10: 27

He says that those who belong to Him “listen” to Him. But in order for the sheep to hear…to listen to His voice, they have to, first, recognize His voice, and second, be quiet long enough to actually hear His voice.

Me?

Well, I realize I don’t know My Shepherd enough to recognize His voice among all the other voices that call out to me inside my head. I listen to all of those voices without discriminating which one is the One and Only I should actually listen to. I don’t quiet my soul long enough to allow for this discernment either.

Sigh…

How do I get to know My Shepherd better? The same way I would get to know anybody else: spending time with Him.

How do I quiet my soul long enough to hear His voice? I take captive my thoughts, put them at the foot of the cross and accept the fact that I am not at the driver’s seat.

I am just a sheep. I am not the one carrying the staff.



Lord, please, help me to listen to Your voice and let it soothe my soul as it calms it down long enough for me to relinquish my thoughts to You and allow You to be the Shepherd of my heart.

The Elephant on the Highway

How do you eat an elephant? Yeah…I know… the first time I heard this semi-rhetorical question I was confused. I was like, “what? … wait, does it taste like chicken?” I’m a little slow…so it took me a while to get it. And that’s how I am with everything. It takes me a while to get most lessons, especially those divine lessons God so diligently tries to teach me.

I have been so very overwhelmed by life lately, that I have not been able to write much at all this month. I don’t like it when I allow time to slip by without setting aside some to let the Holy Spirit cover me with His meditations as I type. This is my time with the Lord. The very sound the keys make when I press them down on the keyboard soothe me and center me. It’s no wonder I’ve been so out of whack, anxiously tripping by the days as if sleep-walking. I need to get back on track. I need to exchange the craziness of the last few months for moments of peace and freshness.

This past weekend was not one of those moments.

Let me tell you. I despise driving. My limit of driving without stopping is one hour… and a half if I really push myself. Well, last Thursday I had to drive 5 hours by myself one way…in the rain…part of it at night. It was probably the worse driving conditions, second only to a blizzard…btw, I have driven in a blizzard…

At any rate, I was not happy. When I got to my destination, if it hadn’t been because I know how dirty hotel carpets (all carpets for that matter) are, I would have kissed the floor. I did kneel down and praised God for keeping me safe and putting that awful drive in the past, though. Then, I realized I had to do it again in two days…sigh…

When the day to come back home arrived, I woke up as early as possible and as soon as there was light, I got on the highway. The day was bright and sunny and I was driving west, which helped. The trees looked beautiful and the music on the radio was fun! But the road looked as if it would swallow me up, still. My uneasiness with the highway was all the same as it had been two days before. There might not have been any rain or confusing, flashing lights passing me by, but the miles still extended the same distance. Then, I remembered the elephant.

Sigh…

So, I decided to eat the following 223 miles or so, one bite at a time.

I took advantage of interchanges and rest-stops to the fullest. And I broke up the trip in chunks… doable chunks… so when I got home I was not shaking uncontrollably nor feeling like I needed to plant my face on the ground and sob. I was refreshed, and able to enjoy the beauty of the day I still had left!

Then, I thought…this elephant menu makes a lot of sense to me now. I think there might be something there for every time I feel overwhelmed. My Father in Heaven does not want me to try to swallow up all the concerns of life in one bite. He’d never ask me to do that, because He knows I’d never learn what I need to learn that way. I’d be too consumed by the heartburn of my gluttony. He wants me to, first, give my elephant to Him… then, allow Him to cut it up into bite-sizes, to finally start eating it one piece at a time…why don’t I remember that, next time?