After living his whole young 11-year-old life in the same place, going to the same school, seeing the same people and going to the same church, he is dealing with the beginning of a new life in a new town, new house, new faces, and the scariest of all…a new school where he knows no one…sigh…He doesn’t like to admit it, but he is mighty scared, and I am too. My heart sinks just thinking about his first day of school. I have had several melt downs late at night when the fear of imagining my dear boy going through something uncomfortable and probably painful overcomes me.
We keep talking to him about being friendly to others and keeping an open minded attitude; giving people a chance and trusting Christ’s guiding hand at all times. “You are never truly alone, Jesus is with you always!” We tell him/us…but the fear persists. He is nervous and due to his stoic attitude, doesn’t want to talk about it. I am nervous, and due to my, I-should-pretend-I-am-not-in-front-of-him attitude, don’t know what to do to help him…sigh…
This morning, however, Dan asked our son if he was nervous about going to the new school. Of course Grant answered with a quick “no.” Dan then told him that it is OK to be nervous. He also told him that we were scared and nervous as well. He went on telling him about how change is inevitable and regardless of our age, we will constantly have to face new things/situations. He gave him some examples of older people going through change in their lives so he wouldn’t think it was just empty words. Grant listened intently and silently. That’s when I used my borrowed line. We heard no harsh/sarcastic replies from him in response (which usually happens with Mr. Grant Contrary) so I took that as a good sign.
Showing vulnerability in front of our children may be a good thing after all. It teaches them that parents are, indeed, humans! Being honest with them about our own feelings and struggles teaches them about reliance in the One whose strength makes it all possible in spite of our weaknesses. And I pray it teaches him that he can come to us and to the Almighty to pour out his heart with his issues at any time.
As the first day of school approaches really fast for my sons, and my own jitters increase, I’m going to try to remember to trust in the Lord, for He protects His own. And I’m going to try to remember that it is just another beginning, and it is supposed to be scary…soon it will become an ending…but that’ll be a different post.
Trust in him at all times, you people;
pour out your hearts to him,
I always love your posts Gisela. Thank you for sharing. You know...one of the most influential adults in my childhood was a pastor (whom I met at Camp Lambec) who was never afraid to be vulnerable with us about the struggles in his life. Looking back I realize how important that was. By him doing that, it made him so much more real and so much less "God like" if that makes sense. It is always refreshing to hear about someone else's struggles / fears...especially when that person seems so much more Holy or Religious! :) Your boys are so blessed to have you and Dan as parents! xo
ReplyDeleteThank you so much Tiffany for sharing your thoughts and comments. I totally understand what you say about your Pastor! The fact that you still remember him is an amazing testimony to the truth of what you are saying. I will try to remember not to pretend to have it all together so much in front of my boys...that gives them a false image of what life is really like. The important thing is for them to realize that God is with them to help them up every time they mess up (He picks us up in our baskets as we become basket cases : ) thank you again!
DeleteWhat a great line! It makes me want to face the scary and enjoy the middle, knowing the sad will eventually come. I hear your mother's heart here! It is a scary place to be and admitting that helps to let go and grab hold of God who always says, "I got this!" Blessings to you as you walk through this season of scary beginnings. May the joy of the experience come quickly! Blessings to you and thanks for visiting Inking the Heart. Love, Rachael
ReplyDeleteRachael, thank you so much for your insightful comments. I like your perspective on facing the scary so we can enjoy the middle! that is a wonderful way to look at it. Thank you for your kindness, blessings back to you
DeleteI will pray for your son (and you {wink}) as us mothers have our hearts hurting when our children are hurting in some way. This touched me and encouraged me for something with my children. Thanks for sharing this over at WholeHearted Home this past week.
ReplyDeleteThank YOU Judith for hosting your linky party every week. It is such a blessing. And above all, thank you for your prayers. There is nothing like the knowledge that our Christian brothers and sisters got our backs in prayer when the going gets rough.
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