Random Thoughts of a Churning Mind

The chaotic spin of the end of the academic year came to a sudden stop, mid-week with the news of the passing of an unforgettable friend, only to resume again propelled by the fury of facing my own mortality and the fear of things left unsaid or undone...

Time...what is it?  Where does it go?

Twenty seven years ago my parents were visiting me in Clarion, where I was attending college.  They came to spend a couple of weeks with me and travel around a bit...little did they know that they were to meet their future son in law who was then graduating from the university this very day all those years ago...

Today, the sky is full of wonder as it seems to not be able to make up its mind as to whether it should rain or shine...and so it's my soul...caught in between mourning, melancholy and joy. 

Sigh...

All these thoughts churn in my mind, agitated by the question, "am I redeeming the times"?

Be very careful, then, how you live—not as unwise but as wise, making the most of every opportunity, because the days are evil. Therefore do not be foolish, but understand what the Lord’s will is. Ephesians 5: 15-17

How does one become wise and stop being foolish?  How do I make the most of every opportunity?  How do we ever come to an understanding of the Lord's plan?

I strive to achieve all of these, but I can't help failing at every turn.  Just when I think I have arrived at a place of knowledge...it all crumbles and I'm left standing on rubble.  The truth is, there is much we are not meant to understand while on this shore of eternity.  The mystery of God's ways are to remain a mystery as we dwell on this earth.  We are not to create a comfortable image of the Most High, for as soon as we are finished crafting it, He shows us how little our human brains truly know.  He is the Lion of Judah!  He is not a tamed one.  Why do we insist in making Him into a domesticated kitten.  It is precisely such wildness what makes Him inexpressibly beautiful and inexplicably amazing!

May the Holy Spirit bring order to our thoughts, quiet to our souls and peace to our hearts as we continue the spin of life.  May our churning be purposeful.  May we not get dizzy by keeping our eyes focused on His Face.  May our days not be idle as we pray He helps us redeem the moments while we still perform on this stage.  May we remember that even though He is the Lion, He is also the Lamb that died for us...His beloved.