The Artist works while I wait

The heavens declare the glory of God; the skies proclaim the work of his hands.  Psalm 19:1

The heavens and the earth do indeed proclaim the glory of our Lord and the perfect work of His hands.  It is impossible not to see it all around us.  I have but to look out my window into my backyard to admire the perfection of His handiwork.  Golden leaves shine brightly in the autumn sun against a cloudless blue sky.  He did not have to make the world so beautiful.  But He did, for our enjoyment, He did.  Nature is his canvas and the seasons are exhibits of His artworks.  

I step outside to take it all in, and I am overwhelmed.  Even the crunch of the dry leaves under my feet sounds like the melody of a divine symphony that plays in its annual concert to reveal His glory.  Walking around in this majestic autumn afternoon, however, stirs in my mind a confusing mix of emotions that is hard to keep straight.  I thoroughly appreciate the beauty and enjoy the gift of the sunshine and warmth that the Lord has given to us (especially today, after a rather gloomy, Western PA weekend).  This is the day that the Lord has made, and I do rejoice and am glad in it.  But at the same time, I can’t help but feel an old sting in my heart.  The sting is bittersweet and it echoes a sense a loss.

It is bittersweet because it is so full of reluctant goodbyes.  For once, I do not like to say goodbye to summer.  It was a sad day when I saw our dear neighbors close down their backyard pool for the year.  Now, I look at it from the distance and my heart sinks as I reminisce of the carefree summer afternoons I spent in there with my boys.  Afternoons long gone now, living only in our memories. 

It is bittersweet because fall means that a new school year has started, which reminds me that my kids are growing up way too fast.  It is bittersweet because it is usually in early fall that I go through their closets and pull out all their outgrown clothes to be passed down somewhere else, another reminder of nature taking its course without me being able to stop it.  I know it is such a blessing and a privilege to have them grow up safe, sound and healthy.  So many mothers don’t have such a gift.  I do praise the Lord for allowing my boys to grow up; and at the same time I pray that He will give me the wisdom to enjoy it, in spite of the pain of saying goodbye to their childhood.

Fall also echoes a sense of loss in my soul.  The loss of the leaves foreshadows the loss in my heart.  The loss of my mother, whose birthday was in the fall becomes anew year after year at this time.  The loss of my only brother and nephew, who are now estranged and whose birthdays are also in the fall stabs me straight to the heart when this time comes around.  The loss of what was once familiar and now lays miles away comes back to mark the season with painful goodbyes. 

But like Job, I know that my Redeemer lives, and that in the end He will stand upon the earth to right all the wrongs.  Therefore, as I move through the seasons, I wait on my Redeemer to deliver me.  I not only wait, however, for waiting could become such a passive state.  I move along as I wait.  I pray that I can live in His will, and do what He has commanded me to do as I wait.  Like the song “While I’m Waiting” by John Waller says:

I will move ahead, bold and confident
Taking every step in obedience
While I'm waiting
I will serve You
While I'm waiting
I will worship
While I'm waiting
I will not faint
I'll be running the race
Even while I wait

I'm waiting
I'm waiting on You, Lord
And I am peaceful
I'm waiting on You, Lord
Though it's not easy
But faithfully, I will wait
Yes, I will wait

Listen to the song here - it is worth it! 
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i6X71sXagUY

More lyrics: http://www.lyricsmania.com/while_im_waiting_lyrics_john_waller.html
All about John Waller: http://www.musictory.com/music/John+Waller