Preparing the Ground for Wisdom - More Gems from Job

But where can wisdom be found? Where does understanding dwell? 

Job 28: 12 and 20

 Ever since I knew I would have to add on an administrative position to my teaching duties my soul started rejecting this inevitable reality...so I knew I would need something I didn't have in order to perform it at a decent level:  wisdom.

For months, maybe even a year before I assumed this new position, I began to pray for wisdom so I could perform the added responsibilities of my new situation with a modicum of reason and understanding. As I contemplate my first year into this job...I'm not sure how I would evaluate my performance.  There have been a few highs and plenty of lows...and every time I'm in a low, I wonder, where has wisdom gone...where can I find it?  Why can't I have it? I just don't understand...why do I keep making mistakes upon mistakes...why don't I learn how to make the right decisions...why do I so often find myself using gossip, belittling and complaining about others as a defensive mechanism for my own shortcomings?  Why do I keep ignoring the way I should go and choosing the wrong path?

This is why chapter 28 of the book of Job hit home when I read it.  Job's questions on verses 12 and repeated on verse 20 ring a bell in my soul...I read through, anxiously waiting for the answer...only to find out that nobody knows...not the mortals that inhabit the land of the living, not the deep, not the seas...it can't be purchased with gold or precious jewels or anything that the world deems valuable...so, where is it?  Where can we find this elusive wisdom that is so promised?  James says it in chapter 5: 1

If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you.

How come I've been praying for it, and I still feel as dumb and lost in this job a year in as I did long before I started, when I began praying for it?

sigh...

God understands the way to it

and he alone knows where it dwells. Job 28: 23

Therefore, I cannot pretend to begin to understand how to find wisdom on my own.  It is like Job says, only God understands the way to it...and as such, He leads us to it in His own way.  He gives it freely and out of His own accord...I cannot find it by just looking for it.  He bestows it and He reveals it in His time, when the moment comes...when the soul, the heart and the mind are ready to receive it...

But the wisdom that comes from heaven is first of all pure; then peace-loving, considerate, submissive, full of mercy and good fruit, impartial and sincere. James 3: 17

As I read through the attributes of the wisdom that comes from heaven...the one God imparts...the one I have been praying for and waiting to receive...I see I am not ready yet.  My heart might not be ready to enjoy the benefits of wisdom yet...my soul is not ready to embrace this pure wisdom that comes from heaven.  This peace-loving, considerate, submissive, full of mercy and good fruit, impartial and sincere kind of wisdom that God gives would not find a good dwelling in me at my current state...so it remains elusive.

Perhaps, that's what Job means when he declares in verses 27 and 28:

then he looked at wisdom and appraised it;

he confirmed it and tested it.

And he said to the human race,

“The fear of the Lord—that is wisdom,

and to shun evil is understanding.”

Maybe, it is not enough to pray for wisdom and expect to magically receive it.  Perhaps, we need to add to our prayers that the Holy Spirit will prepare us and turn our desert into a fertile ground...into a soil where wisdom can produce its fruit...maybe my prayer should include that my heart, my soul and my mind become an environment where the wisdom of the Lord can display its purity, its peace-loving, considerate, submissive, merciful, impartial and sincere fruits...

If I think about it.  If I truly examine myself, there the truth will be found:  I am not the fertile ground that wisdom needs in order to flourish.  My pride and my sinful tendencies do not display any of the characteristics of wisdom...

I'm not saying that I need to display these characteristics already in order to receive wisdom, because I believe Scripture, in James in 3: 17 is saying that these characteristics come with wisdom...but, maybe, what I'm reading also is that our hearts have to be willing to accommodate such characteristics.  My heart has to be willing to be pure; then peace-loving, considerate, submissive, full of mercy and good fruit, impartial and sincere.  My heart has to fear the Lord and it has to stand against evil and shun it from its premises.  And to tell you the truth...I don't think my heart is ready to do any of these things yet...

deep sigh...

I don't know if I'm right.  I might be completely wrong here.  But it would make sense why I haven't felt that wisdom pouring over me as I walk the treacherous paths of this new position at work.  So, I am going to tweak my petition a bit to include a humble prayer:  Please, Lord, prepare my soul, my heart and my mind to be the fertile soil where Your wisdom may produce its fruits.  Make me ready to receive Your gift of wisdom as You see fit.  In the Precious Name of Jesus, the Source and Perfecter of Our Faith.  Amen