Saturday, April 29, 2017
A Moment of Calm and Stillness
Well…as I commented yesterday morning, I had decided to embark in a little adventure. I was not going to fret about every tiny detail of one of my classes that I was particularly worried about. Like I said, I usually have every minute of every class period perfectly planned so there is no “mindlessly-browsing-my-phone” time available to my students. Needless to say, accomplishing that makes me a very frazzled teacher. Yesterday, I was bothered, nervous, anxious (all of the above) about one particular class for which I was not confident I had enough to do. But I chose to trust God rather than to go into a frantic re-planning session.
I went in armed with what I had previously prepared and without rehearsing in my mind how to do this (that was SOOOOO hard…I caught myself constantly trying to rehearse/re-rehearse in my mind…and making myself stop was a task). Anyway, I distributed the activity which involved a significant amount of reading. I hardly ever give them in-classroom reading activities because that is just WAY too passive for me. I usually assigned reading activities as homework. And in the rare occasion that I do give them a reading to do in the classroom…I hardly give them enough time to finish it…why? Because I hate the silence!!!! I get nervous thinking they are going to just pretend to read when what they are doing is secretly using their phones under the desk…
I have issues…yes…that’s the point of all this!
Anyway, I introduced the task. I gave them the reading. And I let go. I kept glancing at them to make sure they were actually reading, and to my surprise…they were! They even seemed interested!
I decided to give them until the half hour marker so everyone would finish the entire reading. And, yes, I had to stop myself from the urge of cutting the reading time short…but I managed. At the set time, we began a rather productive discussion and before I knew it…time was up! Go figured! I survived an unrehearsed, non-fastidiously planned, non-action-packed, non-frenzy-inducing, but rather calmed class!
I forgot to mention, I commended my mind and soul to the inspiration of the Holy Spirit before I did all these, of course. Otherwise...you know…
I trusted God to take care of me in the little things, and I pray I can learn to trust Him in the big things…for He is always with me…even when I am not aware of His presence.
With the help of the Holy Spirit, even the most stubborn of Martha’s can have a small Mary moment of calm and stillness… how refreshing!