Clutter

It's beginning to look like Christmas around here...finally!

Decluttering...boy, is that a concept I've been trying to set into motion in my life for years...only to be slapped on the face by the visible reminder of my utter failure...sigh...

Failing at decluttering is not something you can hide or pretend...the evidence of the crime sits all around you, screaming at you things you don't want to hear, like: you are such a mess!  Look at this!  You can't even get rid of the junk in your house, how do you expect to get rid of the junk in your heart?

Sigh...and sigh again...

Like now, Christmas season for example, this is a prime time for me to feel the ill-effects of my cluttered existence.  There are added things all around the house.  Some may find them endearing and Christmasy.  I find them messy and just...cluttered. I become very intolerant of anything that seems out of place or junky: Dylan's normal mess becomes abhorrent.  Dan's books become nice kindle for the fireplace.  Grant's inability to fold towels and other linen after finishing the laundry becomes worse torture than pulling my teeth or my finger nails...and let's not even talk about my own work area...my head wants to explode!  And forget about the thought of having people over... my family would rather hear that WWIII has started!

sigh...

The thing is...what I need to remember, what I truly have to understand is that, feeling like a failure is one of the tactics the enemy uses to distance me from My Lord.

I mean, think about it: if I feel like a useless, good-for-nothing, worthless, sorry excuse of a woman, sub-human...chances are, I will not feel worthy of being in the presence of the Most Holy God.  And that's exactly what the enemy wants.  When I feel like a failure, the enemy scores points in his twisted game...and he feels like he is winning.

The truth is, the game is rigged from the beginning.  We win!  The children of God win!  So, all these feelings of inadequacy are just a charade the enemy likes to play to distract us from the real game happening on the court of our lives: the game Jesus played and won long ago!

What do I do with myself when I look at my cluttered home and start being plagued by a sense of lowliness and inadequacy?  Find the blessings!  Yes, I need to change my perspective and find the blessings.  I need to stop focusing on my inability to be a good housekeeper and praise God with thanksgiving for all that He has given me: turning the clutter into proof of His provision rather than evidence of my failures.

I mean, it's not like I'm going to just give up and not strive for an organized-decluttered home and heart, but I need to stop punishing myself, and stop allowing guilt to be used by the enemy as a road that leads me away from Christ.

This Christmas season, I want to look around my house and enjoy what I see, and allow my soul to rejoice in what The Lord has being so gracious in giving me...dirty socks on the couch and all.