One of my favorite things of this year's Christmas Season is the fact that Grant is home for a long break. He actually went away to college for his very first semester as a freshman back in August. Covid-19 didn't stop Geneva College from holding face-to-face classes the entire semester, so he was away. They started earlier and wrapped it up right before Thanksgiving, but my son was able to experienced life as a college student for the first time. And even though I missed him like crazy, I praise God for giving him the opportunity.
I didn't get to see him much during the semester. He only came to visit 2 weekends and election day so he could vote in person. Other than that, my boy was pretty much gone for months. So, the day he came home for the nice, long Christmas break, my heart was overflowing with joy.
Listening to him talking to me about the things he got to do during the semester (well...the stuff he chooses to tell me, anyway) makes me giddy. He talks about how he has met like-minded people and made friends, how he hung out with them until wee-hours of the night, enjoying games, movies and conversation, and all that made me think of my own experience as a college kid a million years ago. Boy, was that fun?! I often tell Grant, who tends to be rather up-tight about things, that my time at college was my one chance to live a carefree life and enjoy freedom...within limits, of course...because after having a not-so-fun and stressful high school experience, I want him to have an opportunity to relax and enjoy life a bit...before it gets really difficult...because, life does change after college, doesn't it?
For me, challenges of all types have come my way for the last thirty years since I graduated. It has been a journey. But, you know what? These last thirty years have also been the time when I have been able to grow closer to Christ. When I look back, at my carefree existence those years at Clarion University, I have to admit that I did not seek the Lord with intensity. I was too busy having fun!
But, as we know, there is nothing like challenges, trouble, trials and pain to bring you down to your knees and make you open your eyes to find His Presence and hang on to it as the very lifeline that would be the only thing that could keep you alive.
I want a problem-free life for me and my loved ones. I want safety and security. I want to be fully protected from all kinds of trouble...I want to live a predictable life without any surprises that may disrupt my plans. But, that's fantasy. That is completely unrealistic. And, most importantly, where would a life like that take me? It could only take me away from Jesus, because, it is in the struggle where we realize our need for Him, we grow closer and we make it our purpose to seek His Face when we are in the fire.
Like my devotional reading stated it so clearly and beautifully today:
"Make Me the focal point of your search for security. In your private thoughts, you are still trying to order your world so that it is predictable and feels safe. Not only is this an impossible goal, but it is also counterproductive to spiritual growth." (Jesus Calling by Sarah Young)
Our goal should be to live in conscious and intentional awareness of His Presence, in total dependence, seeking Him first...and, as experience has showed me, that doesn't tend to happen when I'm carefreely cruising on the smooth roads of life...
This is why, this Advent Season I want to seek the protection and safety and carefreeness of His Sovereign Presence...where I can rest, regardless of the problems I have to face. I want to seek the feeling of peace that knowing He is "for me" gives me. I want to trust Him.
As I observe Grant enjoying this season of his life, I pray the Holy Spirit will reveal to him and to all of us that we must...
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